The Bathroom Befuddlement.

Like all the great minds of my time I have all of my best ideas in the bathroom. 

Wait! It's not what you think. 

I don't get some serious thoughts while squeezing out a deuce. I can't even read when I'm in the bathroom, it's one of those get in and get out deals. 

That's why you come to my blog. To read about me having bowel movements. I guess I've finally crossed that line I didn't want to eventually cross. There is no coming back. Up next the failed sexual exploits of Tyson Elder. 

Back to our regularly scheduled blog post about thinking in the bathroom. 

The bathroom is where all my big ideas happen and slip away with the grime, soap, and water of the shower. (I had a particularly blue line to go here.) That's right I get ideas in the shower. 

Generally when an idea rolls around in my head all through the day. Most of the time I'll be at work when this idea pops in to say hello. I scribble some unformed idea in a notebook I keep in a coverall pocket and hope something happens with it. When I get home from my working day smelling like an aircraft's asshole I throw my notebook in my office, and have a shower. 

In that five to seven minute window of fluctuating temperature water the idea comes back in full force, but without me being able to write it down. I think of that witty one liner that will never see the light of day, the opening paragraph to this blog post, or something vaguely business related. 

By the time the soap is out of my eyes the idea is being back to half formed. Lacking those qualities that made it so “unique” in the shower. I rush to my computer, fire up 750, but normally it's gone. The light bulb is there but it is flickering with the last seconds of life. I bang something out, but I know it isn't right. That's why I normally don't have anything brilliant to put up here. A rule of thumb on my blog is that I don't like to put up things I'm not happy with. 

So, here is my predicament. I have ideas in the shower that I can't capture and therefor can't ship. Wow, that sounded really social media douche-y. 

Do you have any suggestions on how I save these ideas and thoughts in the shower without ruining my walls, shower, periodical table shower curtain, and bathtub? 

I'm all ears. Trust me they are clean I just had a shower.

Showers are for Grown-ups.

A fairly grown up idea to me is the idea of shampoo and conditioner.

I’m a twenty something single male. The primary and only things in my shower are one of my endless supplies of Irish Springs bars of soap, and a bottle of Head & Shoulders. Both of which I use regularly as in daily to combat the life long battle against dandruff and being smelly. It wasn’t until a few months ago maybe even longer I realized I had beardruff. 

Beardruff: [bee-arr-da-ruff]  A flakey dry skin stuff that falls out of ones beard making the front of you shirt look like a snow globe dry heaved on it.

So when I told someone about my sort of embarrassing situation they suggested I use a moisturizing shampoo and conditioner to moisten the skin under my beard and moustache.

Now I’m one to have always believed conditioner is a scheme made up by the shampoo companies to sell you shampoo in other bottles, but I was told by my hairdresser it actually does stuff. That stuff I don’t remember because I didn’t care to keep listening.

Then I got fancy shampoo and conditioner for free. I’m going to try it and see if my beardruff goes away. 

So now my shower has four things in it. A bar of soap, Head & Shoulders, fancy moisturizing shampoo and conditioner. Personally that is more then I want in there, but I guess one needs to grow up sometime.