Snow Day (so far).

When I was looking out the window at 2AM this morning I had this thought in the back of my mind that crept through the next few hours of sleep. “Did I fuck up my karma somehow?”

Five and a half hours later I was clearing the half foot of snow off the truck in what felt like a blizzard (I'm getting soft in my old age). I put the truck into 4Low, and rolled up the driveway. Visibility was the shits but there was no one on the road. I took my time and made it to work. In a losing battle I shoveled snow for two hours only to watch steps behind me fill in.

I left. There was no point in us being there. The coffee shop was open, and I figured I would swing in to grab a coffee before going home. I got out of the truck, wiped the ice off the wipers, turned to start to the door, and just like that I was face down in the snow.

A path not cleared. I tripped over a curb. I sprung back up in shock, but more embarrassed. I come here everyday how did I not know the curb was there. Oh yeah, snow. I ordered a coffee and a sandwich to go, and sat down at a table. Only to realize that my right foot was now killing me. Every movement a sharp pain runs up my leg.

I shuffled down my driveway, stripped off my snow covered coveralls, boots, and jacket. I made my way to my bedroom to collapse in pain, embarrassment, and an oncoming wave of loneliness.

The snow, the country, and where I live are isolating. I lay here wondering to myself if I could get help if I actually needed it. It is the first time in a very long time I've felt vulnerable and alone where I live. Sometimes you just want someone to take care of you or drive you to the hospital. Sometimes you just want your parents to look after you.

Against my better judgment I'm not going to brave the roads to go to the hospital to get my foot looked after unless I really have to. When the snow stops falling and the roads are actually plowed. Until then I'm going to lay here alternating this cold pack on my foot, napping, and reading.

I'm an adult now?

White Wilderness.

Living in this little pocket of the Pacific Northwest we seem to forget that it is still actually winter for the rest of Canada in the middle of February. So when a we get what Manitoba would consider a dusting we freak out and call it a “snowpocalyse.”

We forget to how to drive and call it a snow day as soon as we have an inch of snow in our driveways. We don't do courtesy things for the rest of the public like shoveling our walkways and sidewalks in front of our houses (a ticketable offense). Instead we curl up around the cold glow of our television set with the heat cranked, because we don't know how to start a fire in our fireplaces. All the while praying to god the power won't go out or even worse the internet.

I haven't left my house since Sunday, and when I say I haven't left the house I mean I haven't opened my door. It is one of the perks of unemployment. That, insanity inducing boredom, and crippling depression (just kidding). So when I look in my refrigerator this morning I realize I only have half a carton of juice, some frozen veggie burgers, a couple eggs, and two browning bananas. It's a shitty day to need to grocery shop.

I don't have a vehicle so doing a trip to the actual grocery store is out of question. It isn't, but I don't want to be that guy on the bus with his groceries. Plus still having to walk 1.5km home from the bus stop loaded with frozen pizzas, and vegetables seems dreadful. Instead I decided I would get the basics from the corner store for a ridiculous amount of money.

For some reason when I decided to move to the country I thought I would eat a lot of peaches. Instead anytime I want any I have to walk almost two kilometers to get to any for of civilization to catch a bus to go buy some at the store.

Eventually I suited up in a semi-winter jacket to brave the blowing snow and arctic blasts of 0C. All for some milk, club soda, a loaf of bread, some oranges I'm not sure about, and crackers. I'm sure that will last me until the snow is gone.

In a day or two the snow will be gone, and we can forget any of this ever happened.

Living in this little pocket of the Pacific Northwest we seem to forget that it is still actually winter for the rest of Canada in the middle of February. So when a we get what Manitoba would consider a dusting we freak out and call it a “snowpocalyse.”

We forget to how to drive and call it a snow day as soon as we have an inch of snow in our driveways. We don't do courtesy things for the rest of the public like shoveling our walkways and sidewalks in front of our houses (a ticketable offense). Instead we curl up around the cold glow of our television set with the heat cranked, because we don't know how to start a fire in our fireplaces. All the while praying to god the power won't go out or even worse the internet.

I haven't left my house since Sunday, and when I say I haven't left the house I mean I haven't opened my door. It is one of the perks of unemployment. That, insanity inducing boredom, and crippling depression (just kidding). So when I look in my refrigerator this morning I realize I only have half a carton of juice, some frozen veggie burgers, a couple eggs, and two browning bananas. It's a shitty day to need to grocery shop.

I don't have a vehicle so doing a trip to the actual grocery store is out of question. It isn't, but I don't want to be that guy on the bus with his groceries. Plus still having to walk 1.5km home from the bus stop loaded with frozen pizzas, and vegetables seems dreadful. Instead I decided I would get the basics from the corner store for a ridiculous amount of money.

For some reason when I decided to move to the country I thought I would eat a lot of peaches. Instead anytime I want any I have to walk almost two kilometers to get to any for of civilization to catch a bus to go buy some at the store.

Eventually I suited up in a semi-winter jacket to brave the blowing snow and arctic blasts of 0C. All for some milk, club soda, a loaf of bread, some oranges I'm not sure about, and crackers. I'm sure that will last me until the snow is gone.

In a day or two the snow will be gone, and we can forget any of this ever happened.

Living in this little pocket of the Pacific Northwest we seem to forget that it is still actually winter for the rest of Canada in the middle of February. So when a we get what Manitoba would consider a dusting we freak out and call it a “snowpocalyse.”

We forget to how to drive and call it a snow day as soon as we have an inch of snow in our driveways. We don't do courtesy things for the rest of the public like shoveling our walkways and sidewalks in front of our houses (a ticketable offense). Instead we curl up around the cold glow of our television set with the heat cranked, because we don't know how to start a fire in our fireplaces. All the while praying to god the power won't go out or even worse the internet.

I haven't left my house since Sunday, and when I say I haven't left the house I mean I haven't opened my door. It is one of the perks of unemployment. That, insanity inducing boredom, and crippling depression (just kidding). So when I look in my refrigerator this morning I realize I only have half a carton of juice, some frozen veggie burgers, a couple eggs, and two browning bananas. It's a shitty day to need to grocery shop.

I don't have a vehicle so doing a trip to the actual grocery store is out of question. It isn't, but I don't want to be that guy on the bus with his groceries. Plus still having to walk 1.5km home from the bus stop loaded with frozen pizzas, and vegetables seems dreadful. Instead I decided I would get the basics from the corner store for a ridiculous amount of money.

For some reason when I decided to move to the country I thought I would eat a lot of peaches. Instead anytime I want any I have to walk almost two kilometers to get to any for of civilization to catch a bus to go buy some at the store.

Eventually I suited up in a semi-winter jacket to brave the blowing snow and arctic blasts of 0C. All for some milk, club soda, a loaf of bread, some oranges I'm not sure about, and crackers. I'm sure that will last me until the snow is gone.

In a day or two the snow will be gone, and we can forget any of this ever happened.



Friday Morning.

If there is one thing I hate more than my allergies it is snow. So when I wake up and there is both I'm not a fan.

Oh to be young.

When I was a kid your goals in life were get those shoes with the red flashing LED in the heel and become a Ninja Turtle. While cruising the internet today I realized neither of those dreams has come true.

I know becoming a Ninja Turtle is pretty much impossible, but it is the other one that made me think. Kids today have some pretty radical things that I would like to get my hands on but I am much too old for. Like that skateboard with two wheels on casters, the flashing LED shoe things, little wheels that pop out of the soles of your shoes, and Sled Shorts.

That’s right Sled Shorts. Shorts that go over your snow pants that have a sled built into the ass. If there is snow and some kind of downhill slope you could hypothetically use your sled shorts to slide down the hill without a toboggan.

Think off the possibilities.

Although these shorts are probably geared towards a community that has snow for more then 4 days a year and has more than a foot of snow at a time I could see friends of mine using them.

I’ll just keep drunken tobogganing on stolen cafeteria trays from McDonalds at 2am on the nearest hill instead of making the $40 investment. You’re welcome to join if you are in the neighborhood and it is snowing.